i’m going there. or at least i’m trying to.
i’ve been trying to start a blog since i moved to the city in september. that day in september when i decided i should start one i took an amazing selfie and wrote a bunch of words down about leaving a place i had learned to call home and what i wanted for myself in the up coming year. some of what i wrote included:
what does it mean to be on my own? what does it mean to be really alone, to have chosen it for myself, for the first time, in arguably my whole life? i don’t think i really know. and it feels daunting and scary as hell, but… i hope it means re-learning what taking care of myself looks like. i hope it means writing down lots of things even if they’re the most mundane so that i can look back and remember. i hope it means paying acute attention to how i am feeling, why i’m feeling and what i should do about it, if i do anything, and honouring it to the fullest, while of course, writing it down.
to continuing to and hopefully more often speak hard truths.
a lot of those words still ring true and are nice to revisit and reflect on. the truth is, i’ve always had a hard time keeping a journal or putting my words out there. they’ve never seemed important enough, smart enough, original enough or, i’ve convinced myself that i’ll remember whatever i’ve been contemplating (ha!)
so here i am and i actually don’t know what i’m doing but i’m going to give it a go. patience and understanding would be lovely and gratefully received.
things i wanna try to speak to in this space: Angie, trauma, therapy updates, Beyoncé, crafty things, intentional community and healing, feminism, spinsterhood (being a homebody, recluse, etc), things that make me happy, anger, femme magic and care work, self care, disability stuff, staying soft in a world that wants to make you hard, navigating being a half decent person when you’ve got a lot of privilege and i’m sure as i get going on here, some other things.
do y’all have any other ideas/suggestions for me?
thanks for reading and starting out this weird endeavour with me.
here’s to writing things down and speaking hard truths,
ps. checking out the faq might be a good thing to do.